Bee Nightmare.

It was that time of year again for another awfully realistic bee nightmare.

Again (as it usually is with my bee nightmares), I was in Australia with my mum.

One bee flew directly at me and ended up caught in the end corner of my right eye. I was in absolute hysteria! It got caught right at the point I was closing my eye, so it was wedged in my eyelid but hadn’t stung me yet. My mum kept saying to me “try and to open your eye! I need you to open your eye so I can try and get hold if it!

But I couldn’t open my eye. I was SO petrified that if I opened my eye, it would sting my eye ball.

At this point in the nightmare, as if I didn’t have enough to contend with, a second bee decided to fly into my right ear.

The combination of the two frightened me so much, that I woke up…

I woke up with the feeling of a bee caught in my eye and in my ear. It was absolutely awful. And just recounting it is giving me heart palpitations and making me want to be sick.

I’m NEVER going to get over my apiphobia.

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No Ice Cream?

I had a dream in the early hours of this morning. I had the distinct feeling I was at home, but the visuals in the dream had me located at my mums house. It was late at night, around 11.30pm. Em and I were watching something on TV. Something caught my eye out the window – it was an ice cream van. A very modern one – quite posh (for an ice cream van!). A person had just been served and was walking away from the van.

I popped my head out the front door and asked the man how much longer he’d be around. “Oh, for a while yet” he said. I thought “great” and continued watching the TV. Once I was ready to get an ice cream, I thought I’d better check he was still outside. I asked him another question, which I can’t remember now, then said “I’ll just be a minute”. I’d only been in a t-shirt and knickers so needed to get some trousers on before heading outside.

I quickly go to the bedroom, get some trousers on and walk out the door to the van. As I’m doing this, the man pulls down the shutter to the van, starts the engine and starts to drive off. I’m calling out saying “Wait! I’m coming to buy something now!” He says “Too late. I waited long enough. I’m off”. I just stood there dumbfounded, watching him drive off – disappointed. Damn you ice cream man!!

My Sexual Awakening.

This story http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/south_of_scotland/7754247.stm prompted me to write about my sexual awakening. It probably happened much sooner than many people would think.

Mind you, I didn’t act upon it until a was 18, but it would’ve happened MUCH earlier in my life had the circumstances permitted. If I’d have had my way, I’m sure I would have lost my virginity at a ridiculously young age!

My mother was very open about sexuality with me. She started my sex education when I was about 4-5 years old. She was worried about the things I’d pick up in the school playground and didn’t want me to be misinformed. So many of my contemporaries were given stories of cabbage patches, storks, magic and had silly names for anatomical parts like “pipes” for penises. She taught me things like how impregnation takes place. So I knew when a woman was pregnant she had a baby growing in her stomach, not she was ballooning for no good reason to only be “sent” a child by a stork, or randomly “find” one in a cabbage patch!

I wasn’t banned from watching certain things on TV either. I’d watch adult oriented soap operas and drama series. By the time I was around 11, I was quite interested in the “delights of the flesh”. When I saw people acting out sensual or even sexual scenes on TV, I found it utterly intriguing and thrilling.

Perhaps it’s my Scorpio nature, but I’ve always considered myself a very sexual being. It’s by the age of 11 that I am (I do beg all of your pardons) masturbating regularly and having many sexual fantasies, particularly about older men. I think that perhaps this aspect stemmed from me growing up without my father around, although my brothers are all over 9 years older than me. I looked up to older men, be they teachers, sports stars, actors. I’ve had MANY crushes on older men. Not so much these days, as I’m so much older myself now.

Many of my sexual fantasies revolved around me being involved with older men. Even at my tender age, I found the age and experience of men over the age of 21 so compelling. I’m sure if I’d have had my way, I’d have lost my virginity at 11-12 and to a much older man. I was Lolita!

I am, with hindsight, thankful that no situation ever arose in which I had such an opportunity. I was 18 when I (Finally! In my eyes at the time) lost my virginity to a guy only one year older than me who I’d been keen on for the previous 18 months. Although the relationship went nowhere, he was just in it for “a root”, as we say in Oz, it still was a very special experience that I still can have nostalgia about. Not sure if I could have looked upon it so rose-tinted had I been younger.

Randomist, Dreams.

Just wanted to say that I am really loving and enjoying using my Zen X-Fi. It does take a while to get used to using something new, doesn’t it? I’ve just worked out the playlist bit and now have a BIG 80’s mega-mix playlist with over 400 songs. I’ve made one of all my U2 stuff and another of all my Bowie stuff. And Em worked out how to get AAC files on there for me. It’s really, really good!

Now, on to these dreams…

I had a crap nights sleep really. Chris came up to bed for cuddles (she’s been doing this for the last few months). Once me and Em are both settled, she comes to my pillow and lays next to me for cuddles and smooches. She normally stays only about 10-15 minutes. Sometimes she doesn’t even come up. But over the last week, I’ve had a couple of nights where she’s outstayed her welcome, hogged my pillow and made it nigh on impossible for me to get comfortable and go to sleep.

I eventually did last night, after some hours. She eventually disappeared and I finally got my pillow back in the early hours of the morning (around 5-6am).

Once I was comfortable, I started to have dreams. The first one was about James May (yes, the bloke from Top Gear!). I dreamt I had a thing for him, we met up, he was driving me around in a car and I was flirting with him! I came round from that dream thinking “that was a bit weird, but kinda cool. James is alright!”

I went back to sleep and had a Doctor Who themed dream then. Not too deeply DT’ed, but I saw enough of him 🙂 It more centred around John Barrowman’s character, Jack Harkness and how he came to be the “Face of Bow”. Very strange for me to dream something so plot-heavy. But it was cool.

I didn’t have any other dreams after that and still feel VERY tired. Might need to have an early night tonight.

I’m planning to fill my 1GB SD card with 101 Christmas songs and play them on my Zen in shuffle mode tonight! LOVING using the shuffle mode with my playlists!

L8rs!

Sweet Dreams Are Made of This.

Every night I go to bed, hoping that I’ll have a lovely dream about David Tennant. Most nights I’ll either have dreams, but not any of him, or no dreams (well, no remembered dreams – as we’re all meant to dream every night even if we don’t remember them) at all.

 

But last night was different. Man, did I end up having THE loveliest dream. Not only were me and Mr T together, but I think actually married. Well, in a long-term relationship at least. He’d just come home and asked me to come outside to the car, that he had something to show me. What was it? Only two little children he’d adopted for us?!!? A boy and a girl. The little boy was about 3 or 4 years old, and his sister, the little girl was roughly about 18 months old. They were absolutely adorable – and black -no problem as far as I’m concerned, but would’ve made it quite clear the kids were not biologically ours.

 

I spoke to the little boy, asking his name, while he alighted from the car. In the meantime David was taking the little girl out of her car seat. The last image I had before I woke up was of David walking back to the house with the little girl on his hip. OMG! I just woke up with the broadest smile on my face. It was the loveliest, loveliest dream. Even now I’m like “what the hell was that about?” and STILL catch myself smiling thinking about it. It was SSSOOO sweet!

 

I can only assume it must’ve resulted from a little Mr T overload. In recent days I’ve watched The Quatermass Experiment and some episodes of Doctor Who. The Doctor Who episodes always seem to spark my fantasies. Although I don’t know how they sparked such a far-fetched, but wonderfully dreamy scenario in my mind last night.

 

I finally got a copy of Recovery to watch now. Recovery was a one-off BBC drama with Mr T and Sarah Parish (who he worked with on Blackpool). He plays a man who’s had an accident and ends up in a coma. He awakens from the coma with head injuries that leave him slightly impaired and with a different personality to how he was. It’s pretty heavy stuff, and from the snippets I’ve seen he produces a wonderful performance. I can’t wait to view it proper.

 

Anyway, enough of Mr T dreams for now…

 

This was kind of what the it was like, that lasting image (except only a young boy and girl and the girl was smaller and black).

Ah, to sleep is to dream.

In my dreams! Lol