Big Brother 9 – The Circus Has Come To Town!

Oh, my Lord. Another fantastic array of bimbos, himbos, nerds, geeks and freaks have “gone in” for the summer.

Here’s the rundown:

Dennis

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Camp as! Is a dancer (supposedly). Reminds me of an ugly, fat version of Rufus Wainwright. Oh man, this guy thinks he is SO all that! The man is a troll!

Darnell

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Brit born, but grew up in America. Albino. Has been arrested 5 times (like it’s something to brag about) and never watched Big Brother (reportedly). Despite being albino looks really simian. And he is WHITE, I mean REAL WHITE. When he stands next to the rest of the housemates, woah! So far, the only interesting thing about him seems to be his albino-ness.

Dale

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A true knob! The man said in his VT and I quote “If there is fanny in the house, I’ll nail it”! Eeeewwww, repulsive little sh!t! Gives himself 10/10 for looks (dream on buddy) but 4/10 for generosity – no shit Sherlock! Four is probably scaling it up a bit!

Kathreya (pronounced without the H, so Kat_reya)

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Calls herself the “Cookie monster” as she LOVES cookies. Very bubbly, but kinda infectious. Wants to have her gravestone made of cookies so her family can eat it(!) Originally from Thailand, moved to the UK 7 years ago. A bit Little Britain Ting Tong Macadangdang.

Luke

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20 and a politics student. Knob, but in a different way to Dale, geeky knob. Sexually ambiguous, he likes wearing suits, especially ones he’s bought from ASDA (discount supermarket chain owned by Wal-mart).

Mario (real name Shaun)

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The whole (real name, Shaun) tickles me. Why not just BE Shaun?! He is a serial TV whore. Been on more audience participation shows than you can shake a stick at. Been described by BB fans as looking like a cross between Joey from Friends and Sylvester Stallone. The oldest member of the house at 42. Entered the house with his gf Lisa.

Michael

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Token disabled guy. Was partially blind from the age of 8, been totally blind for the last 10 years. Not sure how he’ll cope in the house and does appear to have a totally unintentional direct way with people. I think he might get himself into trouble/arguments.

There are nine other housemates, most of the female and are either chavs, bimbos or chimbos and I can’t be bothered wasting time on them all. The ones I’ve mentioned are the “stand-outs” for me.

Anyway, I’ve spent more time on this than I planned to and I doubt I’ll be watching any more of it, so that’ll probably be your lot. I’d like to watch it…just for some reason I cannot really fathom. But most of them are SO wafer thin (not as in physically but mentally), I doubt I’ll be able to bring myself to do it. We’ll see.